The day I was depressed
"I feel useless.
It's been a while since I've been this miserable.
I thought i was making progress, but if I compare where I am to where I want to be, it's like I've been standing still. There is so little to show for it.
I don't know what to do. I guess what i need may be some encouragement. I need someone to hold my hands and say well done.
That's one thing I won't get though. I know in my heart I've made progress, but I can't see myself getting to where I need to be!
I don't know what to do anymore.
I need money, like yesterday. I need help, but most of all, I need someone to believe in me.
And here I've got to the root of the problem. I think I can't do it. Everyone agrees, and there's no one telling me otherwise. No voice insisting on my competence.
I want to believe in me. I'm trying to love myself and believe in myself, but I'm scared. What if I fail?
Well, I'll still have to live with myself won't I? If I succeed, if I fail, my body won't change. My mind won't change.
I'll be here anyway. But if I try there is a possibility that I'll be slimmer, more skilled, than I am right now. I may not achieve what I set out to do, but if I give my sincere efforts, won't I be better anyway? Won't I achieve something any way? If nothing else, I would have spent the time much more productively!
I am much better already. I'm not going to vomit 2000 pages in a go! Or climb Everest! But tomorrow, tonight I can start again."
Hey guys! I know that every one of us experiences these bouts of depressive thoughts. This is how I work through them.
For me, the gap between where I want to be, and where I am, can feel wide, and I start to feel I'll never get across. I lose my appetite and curl up in bed. I browse the internet for get rich quick schemes and waste a ton of money. I sleep a lot and neglect personal hygiene if I can.
When I'm sick of myself, I'll cry and make a new plan. Or write my thoughts out until I get to a good place, like the above example.
Why am I sharing this?
Because I know, now more than ever, so many will fall into this pit. I want you to know that you're not alone. You can climb back out. I believe in you. You need to believe too!
It's been a while since I've been this miserable.
I thought i was making progress, but if I compare where I am to where I want to be, it's like I've been standing still. There is so little to show for it.
I don't know what to do. I guess what i need may be some encouragement. I need someone to hold my hands and say well done.
That's one thing I won't get though. I know in my heart I've made progress, but I can't see myself getting to where I need to be!
I don't know what to do anymore.
I need money, like yesterday. I need help, but most of all, I need someone to believe in me.
And here I've got to the root of the problem. I think I can't do it. Everyone agrees, and there's no one telling me otherwise. No voice insisting on my competence.
I want to believe in me. I'm trying to love myself and believe in myself, but I'm scared. What if I fail?
Well, I'll still have to live with myself won't I? If I succeed, if I fail, my body won't change. My mind won't change.
I'll be here anyway. But if I try there is a possibility that I'll be slimmer, more skilled, than I am right now. I may not achieve what I set out to do, but if I give my sincere efforts, won't I be better anyway? Won't I achieve something any way? If nothing else, I would have spent the time much more productively!
I am much better already. I'm not going to vomit 2000 pages in a go! Or climb Everest! But tomorrow, tonight I can start again."
Hey guys! I know that every one of us experiences these bouts of depressive thoughts. This is how I work through them.
For me, the gap between where I want to be, and where I am, can feel wide, and I start to feel I'll never get across. I lose my appetite and curl up in bed. I browse the internet for get rich quick schemes and waste a ton of money. I sleep a lot and neglect personal hygiene if I can.
When I'm sick of myself, I'll cry and make a new plan. Or write my thoughts out until I get to a good place, like the above example.
Why am I sharing this?
Because I know, now more than ever, so many will fall into this pit. I want you to know that you're not alone. You can climb back out. I believe in you. You need to believe too!
Hope this helps someone.
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